The Destroying Pressure Of Being ‘Enough’

Feeling good enough is a lot of pressure. It has always been for me a tremendous weight on my shoulders ; and I’m pretty sure this happens to a multitude of people. Prominently, I’ve constantly felt it over the last years.

.
Will my teachers be enough satisfied with my grades?
Will my help be just enough?
Will I be reprimanded again for not speaking loud enough?
Am I making enough efforts for my parents?
Will I ever equal my sisters?
Will I ever be good enough?

.
Since I was a child, I felt a huge weight to carry in shyness. It’s been a destroying force. I remember when my mother once invited a classmate to my house. We did not often hang out together, and I wasn’t confident talking to unfamiliar people. I could barely say a word to her. Her mother must’ve told me that if I did not speak out, they were going to leave. They did. And I could only be ashamed.

.As middle school started and finally ended, I had not made any friends. My sisters were growing up, too. I soon realized that my younger sister had overtaken me, living a seemingly fulfilled life, whilst I isolated myself in my room. From then on, I had always felt different, from my sisters, my classmates, and my family.

.The idea of being an equal amongst others, in the right place and to perfectly fit in, transformed into a haunting thought. And with constant pressure came doubt. Doubts that became so loud and huge and dreadful that they paralyze you to the core. The observations grow to be valueless, the recurrence making you numb.

Longing to live up to the expectations, climbing up hills of strain, results in rubbles, and frustration. Failure remains the unattainable peak to overcome. It dampens your hopes and lingeringly makes them vanish enduringly. Obsessive comparison gradually becomes your crucial yet ravaging inner power. ‘Enough’ comes to be the uppermost level to reach on the scale of life.

.
But is there such a thing as being enough? Is it not just to be oneself — true to who we are? Is it not just getting up and existing no matter the difficulty of the previous day? Isn’t the uniqueness of each human being on Earth just enough? Ultimately, I’m a strong believer in the beauty of difference and diversity.

It remains tedious to persuade myself that I am enough, even after writing these words emerging from my very heart. I might never come out of my shell. I might never accomplish my biggest dreams. I might never find a friend, or a boyfriend. I might never find a way to send that text message. ‘Maybe’s‘ are endless. But if I do never achieve these, does it make me any less valuable than anyone else? Perhaps not. And, no matter the outcome, Rome wasn’t built in a day. There will be countless ups and downs. Rising and falling continually makes a never-ending lesson. Life will not cease to amaze you with its infinite surprises. Keeping on following your very path might in the end make you just enough, as legions of wonderful things are waiting for you down the road. It’s a lifelong effort to be you, and it is enough.

2015-08-31 17.30.04 .

You are just enough.

NB: The picture was taken by me.

PS —This post was inspired by some very uplifting, inspirational and kind people. I hope they recognize themselves. 💕

signature

23 thoughts on “The Destroying Pressure Of Being ‘Enough’

  1. You certainly are enough! We all are, although it’s harder when you’re younger and feel the pressures of peers and family. Stay true to your heart and your dreams, and everything you ever desired with come to you. Note: I doodle in my notebook, too. Be kind to yourself! xo

  2. I hope I could cheer you up as I am nominating you for Liebster award. 😉
    Please check out my blog later or tomorrow as I am still onto it.

    There is a quote: “You can only try your best, and if they can’t appreciate that it’s their fault NOT yours!”
    Cheer up 🙂

  3. You are unique in your own way and yes you are enough . You just have to believe it.. we all have to 🙂 Keep going in your path ! All the best! xo

  4. I really like the way this is written. I’ve just read this one. I will be back as I need to view some others blogs at the community pool. From what I see your blog is great. The layout is good. Good Luck !!!
    Isadora

  5. I love this post so much.

    I was painfully shy as well, and didn’t believe I’d ever grow out of it. I’ve struggled for years with being accepting of myself and my traits, and it’s only now beginning to sink in that it’s okay to just be me. I’m still pretty shy, but the combination of getting a customer-faced, throw-into-the-deep-end job and simply pushing myself to the limit has helped with that. But honestly, you’re at the point in your life where you’ll probably change, anyway. Just give yourself time… and yeah. Just be yourself. 🙂

  6. you are enough, just be you because you are wonderful, beautiful and just what you are supposed to be, I am 61 years old and it has taken me about 55 of those years to finally learn that I am more than just enough, that I am worthy and good, in spite of what others say so don’t listen to the crap, value yourself, you are worth it all. Many hugs to you my young friend! Michelle

  7. Love it! It is so hard to accept yourself at any age. Trying to get to that place at such a young age I think gets you a lot closer to acceptance then trying it when you’re older. Great post!

  8. I can understand the feeling of not being enough, thinking that I never will be. But at the end of the day, I think it is ourselves that we have to be enough for.
    Well, it is easier said that done, huh?
    Tc 🙂

  9. Great post. I think with life you just become okay – cause life hits you with stuff that one day your like – hey I am good enough. It is a shame we waste time thinking we aren’t good enough. I think the more we push ourselves out of our comfort zone , the more we realise – hey actually I am good and I can do this. We have to do to get past the feeling. But never should we compare ourself with others then you will never feel good. all our unique and it fine. There really is no such thing as not good enough it is in our head – we just ( i know – easier said than done) get another mind set. Action and pushing through comfort zones will make one realise – hey I am good enough.

    great post

    1. That’s it exactly! Breaking out of our comfort zones is definitely the key to grasp all that we’re actually capable of. Thanks a lot for reading!

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s